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Re: Pagan doesn't mean only Wiccan


Queeny,

I entirely believe it's possible. According to Muladzh description, I've been Pagan all my life, without knowing it. emoticon

I did go to Sunday school (or the German equivalent) for two years as a teenager, only to decide that I didn't like the way the Christian church works. So ... emoticon

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Hannah Steenbock
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Re: Pagan doesn't mean only Wiccan



Queenyforever wrote:

I know this is a really old topic, and I've been here for only a short time, but I have a question.
Can a Person be Pagan and not really know it?
I mean, my son has been following the path with guidance from one who has practiced 16 years and he says by the way I accept things, the way I live my life, the way that my only cathedral has been a mountain top or crystalline glacier lake, that I am a Pagan.
Probably a totally dumb question, but what exactly does it mean to 'be Pagan'? emoticon


Queeny, I would have to agree with your son. I am finding that while I was enjoying the Wicca classes I was taking, it wasn't deep enough. I honestly am not sure what to 'term' myself now, as I really do not think I am Wiccan. I do hold SOME of the beliefs, but not all, and it seems there is so much more than what I see or was taught in the short time I was in classes.

Sorry, if I've made a fool of myself or dishonored any of you, by asking... emoticon


Something that I have always said..there is no such thing as a stupid/silly question, and I can assure you that you have not offended/dishonored anyone here, or made yourself out to be a fool by asking. We can not learn if we don't ask questions. That is one of the functions of this board....not only for us to learn about homesteading/gardening from each other, but to also learn about the non-Christian side of ourselves, and where we stand, what part of the Pagan umbrella we may fall under, etc. Never fear asking questions like this.

 emoticon s

I hope muladzh has helped answer some of your question. I'm sorry that I didn't. I honestly don't know where I stand myself LOL.
What I can say...."To Be Pagan", I'd have to say..what that means is simply that you are not a Christian, and that you follow a more nature-based path. You don't even have to have religion in there. It's not always about religion. To the Wicca, it is a religion. One of these days, I may actually figure out what I am.


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Re: Pagan doesn't mean only Wiccan


Crap...just started reading this and I got a call from the doc, need to run in and pick something up.
I PROMISE to be back on tomorrow and read everything carefully and respond...
AND THANK YOU for your responses... emoticon

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4/12/2010, 7:52 pm Link to this post Send Email to Queenyforever   Send PM to Queenyforever Blog
 
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Re: Pagan doesn't mean only Wiccan


Okay, I said I'd be back first thing this morning.
Here is a bit of my "background"...I was raised United Methodist, even accepted the "church" in their ceremony when I was 14 years old. But it always felt so very wrong. Everything felt wrong. I would actually get depressed and my Dad even called my anti-social when I was forced to attend the church functions, do Sunday readings, sing in the choir and I hated even being married in the church......I did it because that was what was expected and all I knew. But to be honest I believe with all my heart that the wedding ceremony started my complete spiral down.
I had always been a happy, fun loving kid. But one who only felt truly happy when surrounded by Nature. The more my family pushed the church, and it's teachings on me the more I withdrew. I'd spend my weekends in the mountains as a teenager, just hiking and camping out instead of being with my friends (only ONE of which I am still **sort of friends** with after all these years.)
But I married, because I did love him, but also I had hurt my back and thus lost my college scholarship, my parents could not afford me to go......so I married, but was truly unhappy. He was in the Navy, and so gone a lot...I drank to kill the emptiness, and the back pain. I worked and volunteered at jobs that kept me as close to nature as possible, usually with the Forest Service.
But my drinking spiraled out of control, I was and am an alcoholic, of course did not know then, or would not admit it.
Needless to say, I spiraled out of control until he could not really stand me. We divorced, I remarried the next yahoo who happened to come along. Unlucky for me, after he got out of the service, we moved to his hometown....his family hated me. They were "tight" and totally Catholic! And the only Nature they did was hunting, trapping, and destroying it.....needless to say I REALLY drank there! Divorced the second one..but I had called my MOM and told her that things were bad......we talked and she mentioned that my first husband, had always sent her a Mother's day Card....every year.
I found out that he was still in the Navy and stationed in San Diego....out of the blue, I looked up his name/number and called. Scared, not knowing what he'd say...all he said was "when are you coming home." emoticon I said, as soon as I could save up the money......he told me to get to the airport the next day, there would be a ticket waiting for me.....and there was.
Needless to say, I flew out there and he was STILL the one I loved....divorced #2, but I still had my issues to solve and I was lost. I had no "God" to follow, no one I could turn to....who could fill that emptiness, that void....but I needed something. I filled it with alcohol and drugs...till finally he was out to sea and I went up to the mountains. Went way far out, further than I'd ever gone before.....found this incredible cliff. Sat down, with my bottle of Jack Daniels and started drinking it. I had fully intended on drinking it to get up the courage to just fall off the cliff...
Instead........well, I don't know for certain what happened, but this is what my heart tells me happened. I drank so much that I passed out. Somehow, I slept on that mossy cliff all night safe and sound, without so much as a mosquito biting me....
The morning sun slipped up and right into my eyes. I awoke, sat up....saw that sunrise, smelled the earth warming, listened to the animals awakening, heard the rustle of the wind in the pines....and I KNEW right then and there, that I loved Nature too much to die; that Nature loved and protected me, and that I could feel full filled by Nature alone! I wanted more of it, I wanted to protect it, be in it and I wanted my Husband to enjoy it too...but I had a lot of changing to do.
To make a long story not quite so long.. emoticon I admitted to myself that am an alcoholic and have not had a drink since...that was 22 years ago. I went to work for the Forest Service, clearing the trails and working in fire look out stations....got hubby interested in camping and we camped as often as we could. I also turned completely away from any "Traditional religious teachings" even managed to have Hubby see the "light" as to how they taught nothing but lies, and deceit..(now with all this coming out about the priests...he's really seeing the crap)...but we never attended church, and when our son was born, he never stepped foot into one, he was never baptized, (to the utter horror of relatives of course!) and I raised him on Nature, taking him out walking in the woods, explaining as much as I could to a very curious little boy. On TV we watched Nature shows...I listened to music from John Denver, and Celtic and alternative stuff....that sounded like nature...whales, thunder, rain...mixed into music.
That is how he was raised.
Then this last maybe year or so, I noticed a strength in him, a different man was emerging. When I asked him he told me he was being "guided" by a Wiccan High Priestess. Of course I had no clue what that was.......over the last few months I've done research on the internet, he and I have talked extensively. I love how his heart feels now, I love that he says he's happy and whole....and when he told me that I was a "Pagan"....and explained what he was told by this woman (guess he had been talking to her about me)...I looked it up and thought perhaps it was possible.
So I have been on many sites....unfortunately I started on one that was "Wiccan".....It had so much information that I mostly just read there, but I always got irritable there. Bad vibes, if you believe in that.....
Strangely, enough.....I ran into Firle doing Runboard stuff. And for some reason, felt very comfortable when Firle was around, and so followed Firle here....
And began talking just daily stuff with all of you.....especially Saijen. Sorry Saijen but I feel as though I've known you for a 100 years! emoticon
And so that all lead me to ask that question...and I thank you Muladzh, for your description and information and I thank ALL of you for the comforting way you accepted me, for my heart feels warm here. If that makes any sense at all.... emoticon

Oh and sorry for the NOVEL...the words just kept tumbling out and I just kept typing... emoticon

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4/13/2010, 1:46 pm Link to this post Send Email to Queenyforever   Send PM to Queenyforever Blog
 
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Re: Pagan doesn't mean only Wiccan


Oh, dear Queeny! You've come through so much.

I've always admired you for your gentleness and how you keep giving kindness everywhere. Now I can see it's hard-won. You are an amazing lady, and I'm so grateful you're my friend.

  emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

Yes, you're Pagan, down to the core. Your love of nature is the biggest part of it. emoticon

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Hannah Steenbock
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Re: Pagan doesn't mean only Wiccan


I'm breathless, and touched, reading your story.

You are following your true heart's path, and it means nature. What could be more Pagan than that?

Namaste
Cat

(I bet all of our stories have similarities. I was raised in the Catholic church, it never grabbed me, I hated reciting something so personal as a creed -- which I didn't believe in anyway -- with a huge group of strangers. It all felt wrong. I have been drawn to nature all my life. I don't follow a formal path -- this may simply have to do with the fact that I don't make time for the details and learning of a formal path -- but I call myself Pagan, or maybe Daoist, or both. )
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Thank you both so much! I do feel at home here on this board, it's peaceful and calming, easy on the spirit... emoticon


You are following your true heart's path, and it means nature. What could be more Pagan than that?




Yes, you're Pagan, down to the core. Your love of nature is the biggest part of it.



Maybe that is why I live in an RV!!! emoticon


I'm so grateful you're my friend.


That means so much... emoticon

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4/13/2010, 6:03 pm Link to this post Send Email to Queenyforever   Send PM to Queenyforever Blog
 
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Queeny as I sat here and read this, I cried!! Still am! You have been through so much, and came out the other end of it with flying colors....the best kind of colors. I am so glad that you didn't fall off that cliff. I wouldn't have had the pleasure of having you as a friend if you had.
I am VERY glad that you followed Firle here. Firle is one of few people that I feel very comfortable with online. She has a presence about her that makes me feel OK about things..even when I feel like I'm being obnoxious or a bit on the 'blonde' side..LOL. THANK YOU FIRLE!!!
Of course, Fenyx and I are close..we're cousins. Yeah, we have our moments, but we're blood family..we're allowed LOL.
I honestly can not say anything negative about any of our regular members..and some of our new ones. There is just a wonderful comaradery (sp?) here and I truly think it has a lot to do with the simple fact that, while we are from all walks of life, and follow different paths, we are tolerant, period. We all have warm hearts and we love our friends/family very deeply. As for this place being peaceful, all of us admins and our moderator work to insure we don't have all the trash talking, fighting, and negativity that other boards seem to have. If I see a possible problem beginning, I do my best to nip it in the bud, in a quiet, gentle way. This board has been here for a while, and I can honestly say that we've never had any REAL problems. A few strong disagreements, but no real problems. THAT is due to ALL of our members here..not just a few!

I was raised Southern Baptist and was baptised at the age of 8. Married my Sunday School teacher (we was only 6 yrs older than me)....and we all know how that ended!!!!! emoticon
My mother has no idea that I am on a more Nature based path. She just thinks we can't find a church that DH and I can both agree on. While that is true, it's not what keeps me out of church. (I have a sticker on my car that says 'Nature is my church') I LOVE IT!!! I have even been in a place of authority in several churches. I was never truly happy. I've been Baptist, Pentacostal Holiness (I was happiest there...but still not fulfilled) and Assembly of God. So, you see, you are not the only one....Cat, me, even Fenyx went to church pretty regularly as a kid....our families went to the same church for a while when we were little. The dogma just seems to be wrong...not all there...something.

Just know that you are loved and wanted here. There are a few people here that I'd love to meet in person...you have been added to that list. I've met TexasMadness...she's such a sweetheart!!! She, her hubby and a friend traveled right past my town last year on their way back to Texas from a trip they were on. I was so excited!! And, soon, I'll get to meet muladzh and his wife. I want to meet Firle too. Don't know if that will ever happen, but one can hope..lol. And, there is you...and Corbin of course!!
Another one is CottageMom. She's not posted since she came back. I hope she is OK. I have actually talked to her on the phone several times in the past. She's another sweetheart. Maybe one of these days, you and your DH can travel this direction and we can meet!!! emoticonemoticonemoticon

I'm glad you are here!!! Oh..and that remark about feeling like you've known me for 100 years...lol....Yeah..I know I'm old, but sheesh!! emoticon No...I know what you mean. I actually remarked on this in your thread in the Pagan forum. I think perhaps we are old souls and have met in a former life...like I feel my best friend and I have. So, who knows..maybe it's been longer than 100 years that we've known each other!!! emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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Re: Pagan doesn't mean only Wiccan


Now I'm all goosebumpy too... emoticon
Thank you for all that...for the soul bearing and the insight on all the others here, it's nice to know... emoticon
I'm glad I never rolled off or jumped off that cliff, or I'd have never met all of you, nor would I have the chance to make so many people smile....I like doing that the best. emoticon
And like I said..."known you forever".. emoticon

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4/15/2010, 9:20 pm Link to this post Send Email to Queenyforever   Send PM to Queenyforever Blog
 
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Queenyforever wrote:
Thank you for all that...for the soul bearing and the insight on all the others here, it's nice to know... emoticon


Any time. emoticon
I re-read what I had said about Cat, me and Fenyx in church...when I said our families attended the same church, I meant me and Fenyx..lol. I've not had the pleasure of meeting Cat....yet anyway!!


And like I said..."known you forever".. emoticon



(nods) emoticon



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